How To Start A Conversation With A Girl On Instagram [3 Steps]
How to start a conversation with a girl on Instagram in a way that makes her want to get to know you?
How to approach a girl on Instagram in an attractive way?
Well…
That’s what we’re going to see in this article…with 3 essential steps you need to take to message a girl on this social media.
You’re going to learn how to craft the perfect DM for the girl you want to approach (I’m going to give you a few examples)…
And when to send it to maximize your chances of getting a response.
If you do it right, the girl you send it to will immediately perceive you as superior to the other guys who message her on social media…
And she’ll be curious about you…and want to get to know you (and might even start hitting on you).
Without further ado, let’s start with the first step you need to take to DM a random girl on Instagram:
Table of Contents
1 – Analyze her profile
If you want to maximize the chances that the girl DM you back, she must not feel like she’s just another random girl you try your luck with.
To prevent this, your first message should be unique. It should be customized based on her profile.
It’s always better if the girl feels that you can’t have sent exactly the same message to hundreds of girls before her.
Your message should feel spontaneous.
Not only because you don’t want this girl to perceive you as a desperate guy trying to get any girl he can to pay attention to him, but also because women prefer spontaneous encounters (like in the romantic movies and TV series they watch all the time).
That’s why you’re going to send the girl you want to approach a unique message.
And to do this, you’re going to quickly study her profile, in order to find elements that will help you to create this personalized message.
And in particular… :
? Her profile picture:
The best way to make your message look spontaneous is to create it based on the girl’s profile picture.
Because her profile picture is what you see first (and it’s sometimes the only thing you’ll see, if her account is private).
Therefore, it’ll always feel more spontaneous than the message of a guy who went snooping through the rest of her photos (or her bio).
So if you can find something peculiar, weird, incongruous…on her profile picture, that’s best.
If you can’t find anything really unique in her profile picture, you can then go take a look at her bio:
? Her bio:
The bio of that girl may contain elements you can use to craft a DM that will hit the spot.
For instance something you can tease her about.
Or something you can use to ask an original question, that will make her want to answer you (more on this below).
2 – Create a message she won’t help but answer
Now that you had a look at the girl’s profile (which shouldn’t have taken you more than 30 seconds, especially if you’ve a good sense of observation), we can talk about the message in itself.
As you’ve understood, to craft a good first message you’re going to use what caught your attention on her profile.
There are two types of messages I recommend you to use when approaching girls on Instagram:
? The Compliment + Question message:
An approach I also like to call “The C+Q Approach”.
You begin your message with a specific compliment, then you ask a question related to that compliment.
For instance, if you can see from her picture that the girl has a nice flat stomach with visible abs, you might send:
“That looks strong to me. Crunches or plank?”
If her hair color ends in a gradient towards blonde (tie and dye or ombré hair style):
“Nice hair. Ombré hair?”
Complimenting a girl is a good way to initiate the conversation with her, starting right away with a positive touch (it’s also an effective way to approach a girl in real life, especially on the street).
See also: How To Compliment A Girl On Her Outfit
But as we’ll see, complimenting her is not enough.
This is where the question comes in.
Its purpose is twofold:
It entices the girl to text you back (provided that this question is backed by a specific compliment, like I just showed you).
But it also and above makes her see you as high status, since your message subtly implies that you’re well versed in stuff that interests women like her…and thus that you probably have a lot of women like her in your entourage (and thus that you’re probably a man with options, a man women like, which immediately makes you more attractive)… It can also make you sound picky, like you’re trying to evaluate the girl (which is the opposite behavior of the needy guy’s behavior women find repulsive).
Your message might also subtly imply that you have above-average knowledge in a subject she’s passionate about. Which definitely helps you score points.
And you do this by asking her a specific question, that only a confident and experienced guy would ask.
You can also use your question to counterbalance your initial expression of interest: like I said above, it can subtly give the impression that you’re evaluating her, or that you are trying to check whether or not your first positive impression is founded.
Just the opposite of all those desperate guys who throw themselves at her feet in the hope of getting some of her attention (and whom she secretly despises).
See also: Good Personal Questions To Ask A Girl
Note: you can also opt for a less direct approach, with a compliment that is not directly directed at her, but rather on her tastes.
For instance, if she’s sipping a pastel red cocktail:
“That looks yummy. Strawberry daiquiri?”
? The funny message:
The second type of DM that works well for starting a conversation with a girl on Instagram is the funny one.
A humorous message about the girl (or what’s around her).
The goal?
To make her experience positive emotions.
Positive emotions that she will associate with you.
But also to make her feel your wit and sharpness of mind. To make her see you as a guy who can potentially make her experience exciting moments (whether sexually or intellectually).
“Are those real? (I’m talking about the coconut trees)” (if she has big boobs but there are also coconut trees in the picture)
Another example of a funny Instagram DM:
“Is it your pussy?” (if there is a cat in her profile picture)
Then following her answer, you can follow up with something like “I’d like to caress it. But only if it doesn’t bite.” (as you’ve understood, here you’re playing on the word “pussy”, which has a sexual connotation: the girl understands it and it makes her laugh, not to mention the fact that it allows you to create sexual tension right from the start, which is a very good thing).
Another type of original DM you can send to a girl:
The Compliment + Humor message, which is a combo of the two types of messages seen above.
For instance, if the girl is posing in a swimsuit on a heavenly beach, you can send her something like:
“Oh my god…so sexy (the color of the water). Maldives?”
A sexually charged compliment, balanced by the few unexpected words in brackets right after, followed by a question that prompts her to respond.
3 – Send your message
Once your message is ready, send it.
Then wait for a response.
Some important tips to avoid screwing things up:
Avoid sending your message on Friday or Saturday night:
First of all, she probably won’t be available (she’ll probably be with her friends or family)…
And two, it could make you look like a guy who has no life, no friends (since he has nothing else to do on his Friday or Saturday night but send messages to strangers on Instagram). Which is anything but attractive and will just make her want to run away.
Give her time to respond:
Don’t be like those weak beta males who start to panic when they don’t get a response after two minutes and send the girl another message to make sure she got the first one.
If you do that, she’ll see you as needy, clingy guy (which will just make her want to ignore you).
Be detached from the outcome:
She didn’t reply?
That’s not a big deal.
And it’s bound to happen.
Some girls will be interested, some won’t.
The good news is that are virtually an infinite number of women on this social media (Instagram has more than 1 billion users worldwide, with millions of beautiful women among them).
Related: How To Start A Conversation With A Girl In Person
[MUST-READ] Be DOMINANT with Women: Know How to MASTER Them (In Everyday Life) to Make Them Fantasize About You
If you enjoyed this article (and even if you didn’t), you’ll love this other extensive post I recently published:
There’s something you need to understand:
Women want to be submissive.
They fantasize about sexual submission.
And when they meet a dominant man who has the potential to satisfy their submission fantasies, it makes them desire him intensely.
Sounds shocking or surprising to you?
Keep reading…
Today, you’re going to learn how to master women in a way that will turn them on.
You’re going to learn how to dominate women to make them wet with desire.
And NOT just in bed:
You’re going to implement this in other contexts and environments, be it after an approach, on a date, at a party, and more.
You’re going to implement this in your everyday life with the women you like so that they see you as a powerful dominant male who is able to satisfy their desires and take them to seventh heaven.
These actions you’re going to implement daily with the girls you want will lead them to see you as THE man to date.
You’ll stand out.
Women will see you as a potential lover and as a good lay (and that’s a bit of an understatement).
However, there are things you need to understand first.
You’ve got to be ready to try certain things that are a bit bold (more or less depending on the girl and the situation).
It's all there:
Stay solid,
Jack
